Worth Fighting for!

John E. in his book Walking with God talks about fighting for the things in our life that God is wanting us to experience. In other words how often have our schedules gotten busy and hectic and we think about or start dropping things from it that don't seem possible but yet would bring joy into our life, or better yet be what God wants us to do? It is so easy to get wrapped up in life that we let go of the very things God wants us to be a part of.

There have been countless times in life where things got busy and life seemed overwhelming and I just started dumping cargo overboard in a desperate attempt to lighten the load instead of fighting for it. Like when I skipped my graduation ceremony at OSU because life was feeling just a little chaotic, or when I decided not to go on a Chrysalis walk in college because I was feeling overwhelmed at school. I know in both of those cases God had some joy for me and a blessing for me and I missed it. I missed it because I was trying to fill in the blanks on my own. I was relying on myself to make the best decision. We all do this in life when faced with tough choices...but trying to make these choices on our own is not walking with God. We simply can't see all the things that God can see. So I find myself trusting Him more, therefor I am seeking His council more frequently on things that in the past I would have just decided to do because that was what I decided to do.

It is uncanny that this was the reading for the day in John E's book. I have been in prayer with someone in our church this very day that is facing a busy hectic crazy life. They are facing some really tough decisions and it is so easy to just start dumping things overboard. I am praying that they continue to seek God's council as they walk with him. That is a different posture than making choices that just seem "right" to us. God knows more than we do so I am praying that I lean on Him more. I pray that all of us lean on Him more for the choices in our life. Who knows what we might be missing if we don't fight for something we know He wants to do. What in your life is worth fighting for? What is God trying to do in you and through you that might result in joy or changed lives? Consider fighting for it, instead of just dumping it overboard.
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Good grief...here we go again!

Man how many times have I let Satan get a foothold in my life. Particularly around the issue of guilt and shame. Every time I mess up in life Satan is right there to tell me what a lousy person I am or that I have blown it. The biggest area of weakness for me right now is with parenting. There are times where I scream and holler and blow my stack and the feelings that come from that later are just horrible. I feel guilt, shame, and conviction. There are voices that tell me I am a lousy dad and it will never get any better so why even try. Then there are other voices that tell me that I have made a mistake and to pick myself up off the ground and try again. This voice I sense believes in me...is not condemning me but challenging me to be better.

It is so hard to sometimes separate God's genuine conviction in our life from the lies Satan wants to plant in us. I can relate to John E. in his book Walking With God. So often I get confused between what is my fault and what am I responsible for and what actually is Satan just trying to guilt me away from God or shame me into doing something or believing something stupid. This is one of the hardest spiritual battles I feel like I face on a regular basis. I do more often than I'd like wonder if God still forgives me. I often think there are moments where I have blown it and God is far from me and wants nothing to do with me. Man those are lies and I hate those thoughts!!! I am working on bringing the work of Jesus into those moments to discern what is actually something I need to work on or what is it that I just need to ignore because it will only pollute my heart more. Satan is such a big fat liar!

I really think this book has helped me greatly. I love truth that it gave me about my life and my life with God. If I really wanted to be evil and turn my back from God than why does it distress me so to think that? If I really wanted to live a life of sin than why is there so much conviction and hurt that wells up out of my heart when I entertain those thoughts. In other words I am not inherently evil. I have not blown it. Sin doesn't have a strangle hold on my life. To the contrary the bible promises something entirely different. Because of the power of Christ Scripture says that I am, "dead to sin". Sin no longer has control of me because I am Christ's. What reassurance!!! This chapter was huge for me. It gave me some new truths bout how God sees me and how I can trust His feelings about me. Thanks Lord for believing in me when I don't believe in myself. You are an awesome God!
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Reawakening desire & back on JOY!

I wonder how many of us at some point in time have shut our hearts down to things? There is a life we always planned on living, goals and dreams we have never fully reached or accomplished. How often to we stuff our desires deep down into our hearts only to be ignored because it is too risky or it might mean a lot of work and hardship at first. John E. reminds us in his book that the more we stuff things down into our heart the more it cries out for attention. That's the point and the moment where addiction tends to show up. We start looking for some intimacy here or there. the crying heart can't be ignored. I wonder what you have stuffed deep inside you.

I remember in 1996 I started working for a business in Springboro, OH. Erin was finishing up school and we were to be married a few months later in May. I continued this job for 1 year. I was miserable, I hated going to work and spent the whole week looking forward to the weekend. I was quickly realizing the damage I was doing to my heart by ignoring desire. God had put a desire for full-time ministry into my heart years before and I ignored it. I stuffed deep inside of me but it kept popping up. Finally one day Erin and I decided it was time and we packed our bags for Seminary in Louisville, KY. My heart was leaping out of my chest. It was risky and I was a little scared. It was going to be a change and a lot of work, but we went for it and never looked back. I have never regretted following the desire God gave me.

We do have to be careful though. All too often we are following our own personal hearts desire. these are many times desires not from God but ones we have concocted to ease our pain or to numb our loneliness or unhappiness. This is where prayer comes in. We ask God what this longing is our heart is about. Why is it there God? We ask. God is this where you are leading me? Then we can discover if God is indeed reawakening desire in us.

Back to the joy thing for a moment. I have sensed God doing a new and amazing thing in my life since my 9 day Project of Joy while on vacation several weeks ago. Ever since that week I have keep my eyes open more fully for chances to experience His joy. I have learned to listen more to His voice and to set aside my frustrations and impatience for things. I am finding that I am accepting disappointment better and keeping my eyes open for the beautiful thing He is trying to do in and around me and my family. Thursday last week we would have normally had small group at our house. However, several families were not able to make it and the one remaining family was thinking about going to the fair. We decided to go to Meadow Brook Park in Bascum for a picnic that evening and play time with the kids. We have done this before however we have taken cold sandwiches and things...never cooked right there.

I have always wanted to go to the park with the family and kind of set up shop for several hours while the kids played I would cook and prepare lunch or dinner on the open flame. I new that this was a gift God was going to give us and I wasn't going to let the idea go until we had done it. This night was our night. We packed everything we needed for hamburgers and hot dogs. We packed baseball mitts, soccer balls, and a football, along with some folding chairs. The weather was picture perfect! May have been the best evening of the season so far. I lit up the barbecue and while I was working the grill I played catch with Austin and then kicked the soccer ball with Hailey. Erin played on the play ground with the babies and Tawna and we just hung out for a few hours. It was just a great experience. No large sum of money spent. We didn't really go that far from home. Set up and clean up was minimal. It was a good, rich time to spend with the family. God gave us something beautiful that night and I will always cherish the images and time we had there. What joy He brought to my heart that evening. It was a desire He placed in me a year or so ago and I didn't let it go. I listened and we followed. It was a reminder that He is in the simple things if we invite Him to join us there. I pray that joy continues to abound in your heart. I pray that God is doing a new thing in you. I know He is working in my life.
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Do I love my life?

How many of you struggle in your life with the moment? I know there are times where I feel like I am reaching for something. I don't necessarily know what it is that I am reaching for, which makes it all the more concerning. All I know is that there is a dissatisfaction with the moment. Something inside my heart just isn't right and the sense of fulfillment feels like was once there but is no longer available. I think we all fall into these moments when what is happening in our life isn't really enough. We conjure up some thought of what we might want, or where we might want to be that would make everything better. When the truth is we get those things and we are no better off. Then the question lingers out there that nobody wants to answer. Sadly though it is the question that if able to answer yes to will open up the flood gates of joy. The question is this..."Do I love my life?" I think if we are brave enough to actually ask that question we very quickly follow it up with this question..."Do I really even want to know the answer to that question?"

I do find myself day dreaming a lot. taking my mind away from where I am at to place I think I would rather be. Or I find myself thinking about something that I don't have and then thinking about what it would be like to have it. For me it is a basic realization that my heart needs something. It is crying out. For some reason it is not filled or fulfilled. Jesus reminds us that the only thing that will truly fill our heart to satisfaction is a relationship with him...an intimate, personal companionship. Without that our hearts will cry out, they will ache for something more. And it will unsettle us deeply!

This whole idea brings us back to whole and holiness. Christ goal for our life is that His joy would be complete in us, His love would be complete in us, His peace would be complete in us. I could go on and on here but you get the point. You see the more whole we are in Christ (complete) the more of His Holiness we will be able to take in. That is what I long for. Jesus I turn to you this morning and ask you to fill and fulfill me. Take away the longing of my heart for stuff, places, and people that are not here now and love the moment in life you have given me. Fill me with your satisfaction and contentedness. Thank you for understanding me and still loving me. Amen
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

I've blown it again...or have I

Boy how many times in my life have I blown it. Where I know I have messed up and gone a different direction then where God is going. It is so easy in these times to let Satan's little subtle agreements to creep in at these times. Satan will mess with my concience and convince me that it is all my fault and that I am know God. That God is going to leave me behind and that this one was the straw that broke the camels back. He paints picutres in my mind of God utterly dissapointed with me and angry at me. Yeah you've really blwn it this time John! Why do I think like this? Why is it so easy to get down on ourselves. How come I am so quick to listen to and buy into what Satan in trying to do in me?

Yesterday Hailey spent the morning with me at the office. When she first arrived by being dropped off by her mother she was in another one of her foul moods. Howver this time isstead of responding in frustration and agner like I normally do. I went the opposite direction. I welcomed her in to my office. I had her sit on my lap. And I had this overwhelming sense from God that I was just to let her know in how many ways I love her and am proud of her. We did this for some time and it was rich. However Satan was creeping in again. He was telling me what lousy father I am and how much I had blown it with Hailey and the rest of the kids. He was trying to convince me that it was never goign to get better and there was nothing I could do about. I was definately expereiince some warfare. Satan was trying to steal the joy of the moment sitting there with Hailey.

As we were sitting there and all these lousy thoughts started creeping in. I suddenly heard from God. I heard, "there is something you can do." Spend more time with her...take her to lunch." Wow suddenly this peace came over me and I was filled with hope for my relationship with her and my parenting skills. I obeyed and took her to lunch. Funny though, the rest of the morning all these things popped up tht tried to convince me that we couldn't go, but I shrigged them off because I was certain this is what God wanted. We went to lunch and ate together and didn't really say very much. Once lunch was over we could have left but I wanted to stay. I sensed God wasn't done with this moment. I decided to just hang out with her for awhile and just talk...I asked her what here favorite part of the summer was and she started talking and never stopped. She asked me questions and I talked and we just shared what we liked about vacation and Lakeside. We talked aobut our family. It was a rich time. A great connection with my daughter.

Then it hit me. How necessary was this. How important it was for me to spend time with Hailey and invest in her and just listen to her share about her life and her day. It opened doors...specificaly the door of convcition for me. No longer was this guilt and shame that I had first had in the day. Now there was this powerful presence of God filling me with loving gracefull correction, redirection, and conviction. God was using this moment to not beat me over the head but to love me and give me a beautiful picture of what my relatinship with my kids could look like. I had made the agreement along time ago that with all the kids we had that I was never going to be able to have the patience of the pleasure of nurturing these kinds of relationships. Now God was challenging me to let go of those agreements. He was giving me a chance to change. How awesome is He!

As a result of God's work in my life in this area I have already made some speciffic and necessary changes and adjustments. This is always the hard part isn't it. It's one thing to have God speak to us and show us something. It is altogether harder to make changes to adjust to it. I was much more attentive to my kids all day yesterday and even this morning than I normally would be. It has been good. Thank you God for revealing to me in your loving way the new work you want to do in me. Thank you for not just letting me settle for a mediocre life but a life of righteousness with You. God continue to mold me and shape me into the father, the husband, the pastor, and the man you want me to be.

May today be a great day for you to connect with what God wants to do in you. Live beyond the garbage that Satan wants to pollute our minds with and grasp onto the truth of God's voic in your life. Blessings!
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

God stays with us

I have noiced regularly over the years in my walk with God that if there is something He is trying to show me or do in me He will stay with me on it. There is a persistance in our God when He knows what we need and we are either not ready for it or we are ignoring it. After all we do this with our kids. If there is a character quality or issue that need to be developed in them we will hone in on it and stick with it. We will do everthing in our power to help them with the issue until they finally get it or take ownership of it.

God is a lot like us as parents. He will do everything in His power to help us to the place He wants us to go. Before I left for vacation God impressed upon my heart that I needed to live more fully into His joy. I heard from Him to take ownership of the verse, "the joy of the Lord is my strength". And so I did...well as best I could. Now I am home from vacation and I am still impressed with the fact that I have a long way to go with this joy thing. God isn't done with me there. He is persistant and insistant that His joy be a larger part of my life. So every day this week I am reminded of His joy. I am begin challenged to discover His joy in all things. I readily admit that my heart this week has been distracted from this. I find myself thinking of my family and my parents in Myrtle Beach. I find myself reflecting on our family vacation a week ago and missing that time that we had together. However it is giving me a new appreciation for Erin, my children, and my parents.

This weeks sermon is on...you guessed it, JOY. What else would it be on. I mean isn't it uncanny how God works in us. I am going to be preaching on a topic that is a project for me personally right now. There is a persistance and an insistance from God to make sure we live into the work He wants to do. He isn't just going to go away if there is something we need to work on. He will be right there waiting for us when we are ready to come back to that thing and that work he is doing in us. God will stay with us. Praise Him for that! God thanks for impressing on me the need for greater joy. Stay with me and lead me and guide me.
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Satan is an opportunist!

I readily confess that I am dealing with a little post vacation hang over the past few days. We had such a good time in Gatlinburg with our kids and also with my parents. It has been hard for me to let this go. My emotions and feelings have been all out of whack and I have had a hard time putting a finger on it. I was reading in John E's book this morning and was reminded that Satan is an opportunist. He is going to look for any chick in our armor any crack in our wall and he is going to try and sneak in there and mess with our hearts/soul/spirit.

I think one of the things that gets me in trouble is I spend so much time thinking about the upcoming vacation and I put so much thought into planning it and looking forward to it that once it is over there is this empty moment in my life. I sense that I am grasping to look forward to the next big thing that's coming down the pipe in life and its not there. As I was reading this morning I began to pray against this feeling and this emptiness in my heart. I found myself bringing the power of Jesus against it in order to find out what is at the bottom of it. In times like this I often experience a distance from God, yet in these moments is when I need His presence the most. So I prayed for His presence to become greater in my life. I prayed that He would help me identify my thoughts and feelings and to rid my heart of anything polluting my spirit. I believe this to be a prayer I will keep with me for some time and I seek to follow where God is working and live beyond my own concepts and ideas of life.

I find it kind of humerous that I am dealing with this and the fact that I am preaching on joy this Sunday. I do feel like something is attempting to rob my joy. This is one of those funks that even when something great happens the feeling only lifts for a moment and then it comes back again and settles right there in my heart. I am trusting God to walk me through this time...but I am also trusting Him that I will learn from this and develop a better mindset towards upcoming events in my life, while balancing that with the real life week to week responsibilities I have been entrusted with in family, church, and life. Jesus I pray that you would be my all in all and that your joy would be my strength. God you are so good to me and you have blessed me so. May my life continuw to be a blessing to you and to others. May your Spirit fill me and cleans me of anything that would bring me down and may your joy riegn in my heart. A-men
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Praying during tragedy

I love this line from John E.'s book Walking with God, "hearing God requires surrender, giving all things over into his hands. Not abandoning your desires, but yielding them to God." He shares this thought with us while trying to deal with whether or not to put his dog to sleep. It is a heart wrenching decision and he knows what his heart wants but he is trying to be open to what God wants. He quickly realizes that it is time to let "Scout" go. Though his heart wants one thing he yields to where God is. So he lets scout go and doesn't pray for him to be healed. He heard from God to let him go.

I think so many of us have been in a situation where a loved one is suffering or possibly on their death bed. Our hearts so much want to pray for a miracle but is that always the right thing? Is it possible that God is doing something different, and if we don't pray for a miracle every time, does this mean that we lack faith? What a great question...Our faith is based on God's promises and God does not always deliver when we pray to save or rescue our loved ones. Therefor what would it look like to ask God how we should be praying for these folk? This means yielding our desires for them to what God is doing. Wow this is a fresh concept for me and a challenging one at that. How do you feel about this? Is there ever a time where we shouldn't pray for someone to get well or recover? I would dare say that I have not often asked God's opinion on how I should pray for someone...I have just gone ahead and prayed for them. I am going to think on this one and try this on in the future when praying for someone to get better. I hope this challenges you as well. I hope God continues to do a new work in your heart as he is doing in mine.
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

New Pics in my Blog

Check out the new pictures that I have uploaded from our family vacation in Gatlinburg, TN. We had a blast with Grandpa & Grandma Alice! Just scroll down through my Blog and they will appear on the right hand side. Blessings, Your Dreaming Pastor

Helping others and back to joy

Couple 0f thoughts on John E.'s reading of today. I have been really challenged by parts of this book in places that I have not personally delved into before. I like his piece on praying for others to hear God and helping them in these prayers name the walls and barriers they are facing and praying against them. I also thought the part about watching who you are helping and being careful that their struggles do not latch on to you was interesting. Honestly I have never really thought of it like that before. It however does make sense. There are several stories in scriptures where Satan was working in one persons live and then he began to work on someone else in their vicinity. I do sense that he moves from one person to the next. Have you ever experienced gossip? One person starts in on someone else and then everyone else in the room chimes in even though several know it is wrong. Or someone is in a lousy mood while everyone else is in the room is in a good mood. Suddenly, guess what happens? The persons bad mood seep sin to everyone else. It influences them. Are these just emotions or is there a stronger power at work here? Remember who is the one person who would want to steal your joy? Satan! I think this is something new for me to think about. How about you?

On this joy thing in my life. I am sitting here this morning at home in front of the computer reflecting on our family vacation that we arrived home from yesterday. As I think about my favorite moments the ones where God's joy really shined in my life I find myself thinking of my parents. Getting to spend a week with my mom and dad brought such simple and real joy in my life. I never realized how much I missed them until we spent this week together. They left us yesterday and headed down to Myrtle Beach. My heart so much wanted to go with them. It was so hard to go in the opposite direction yesterday. I can picture them pulling into their camping site this morning right on the Ocean. God thanks...you are so good to me. Please bless my parents and give them great rest. They will need it after spending the week my my 7 member family! lol

One other memory stands out that sums up this new joy God has in my heart. Yesterday we stopped at a Pilot gas station North of Lexington, KY to fill up. As I was filling up Erin took all the kids to the bathroom. I will never forget the scene. My 5 kids lined up on either side of Erin holding each others hands as they walked in. They didn't see me but I saw them. At that moment I knew how blessed my life is. This unexplainable joy filled my heart. I knew at that moment it would be a picture I would never forget. One of those things I would take with me forever in my soul. Normally I would be in one of my maniacacle moods (not sure that is a word) trying to get the family home from vacation going a hundred miles per hour. I also would usually be a little depressed (which I was) that the vacation was over. Instead God gave me the highlight, however small it was, of the entire trip right there at Pilot! I wonder if I saw this because maybe God has been working on my heart, and in that moment I chose to include him in on something as simple as getting gas at a filling station. Because I did this I believe he provided me something beautiful...I was open and he delivered...AWESOME!

Thanks God for all you do in my life. Thank you that you are working in my heart and growing me everyday. Thank you for filling my life with renewed joy and a simple strong Spirit. God is good and I hope you experience that today. Are you open to his joy, walking with him everyday in everything you do? If you are you are in for something special. I have experienced in small doses and it is awesome!
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Time to come home...

Well vacations are always awesome and for how long it seems like it takes for them to come they are over that much more quickly. Tonight is our last night and early tomorrow morning we will be hitting the road to come home. Seems like we have been gone for much more than a week. It will be good to get back and hit the ground running. As I wrap up this Project of Joy while on vacation I realize how hard it is to have joy in all I do. I admit it to be painfully difficult to include God in on everything, all my decisions. Though I have sensed I have taken significant steps in my faith and my walk with God while here in Gatlinburg. Something I can honestly say hasn't happened on vacation that much before.

I do sense that I have a greater awareness of His work in my life. I fee like I am able to hear him more and sense where he is heading. However I still have much work to do with my patience with my children and family. I look forward to allowing God further into everything in my life and seeking Him more fully in as many decisions as I can. I do believe that though I have not reached all my goals that it is intended that I celebrate the ones God did work in me. I blame nobody else but myself, but also know that in God's eyes I am not a failure but his child who is dearly loved and who has access to the fullness of his joy. The joy of the Lord is my strength.
Walking together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Never been unloved

I do find it difficult sometimes to fathom how deep God's love for me goes. Often I wonder how God could love me based on what I've done, or am thinking. It is our human nature that tends to deny us the ability to know God's love for our hearts and this creates a barrier when it comes to hearing Him. Our ability to hear from God as I have noticed in my life thrives in my ability to believe and know God's love for me. When I know God's love then I know that whatever he is telling me comes out of that love. Therefor my trust and faith in Him becomes more fluid. I am praying today that I would know His love more in my life. As I know his love more and live into it His joy will not be far behind. What greater joy is there than to know the God of the universe loves you unconditionally? I pray you know His love and expereince his joy.
Walking together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

I love Jesus, don't I get a nice "normal" little life?

I love the statement John E. makes. If your a Christian you don't get a nice "normal" little life. When don't get to do what we want to do when we want to do it. In all things God wants to be included in our life. So many times I don't want to pray for things. I don't want God messing with my perfect little life. I don't really want to hear from God because if I ask I am going to have to deal with and go with the answer. What if I don't like the answer? What if it means more work or sacrifice? Actually I sometimes just don't want to take the time to pray because it is inconvenient. I would just rather buy the car than ask Him. I would rather just go to Gatlinburg than ask Him. How about you? Do you find it challenging to let God in on EVERYTHING? I do.

Today while we were swimming in the pool we met a really neat couple who had a little girl named Addison. It turns out that Addison has a very similar syndrome to what Isabel has. However she is much worse physically and mentally. We chatted for awhile with the family. It turns out that Isabel has a Chromosome 10 deficiency and Addison has a Chromosome 9 deficiency. Some of the characteristics, stories, and surgeries were eerily similar. What a reminder for me that just because we know Jesus doesn't mean life is going to be normal or easy. Challenges will always exist. The question is can I still find God's joy in these challenges. Today I can honesty say I take great joy in Isabel. I don't even think about her struggles with Apert's. In fact i find myself knowing that I wouldn't want her any other way. She is just perfect.

I asked Addison's mom if they have a church home where they are from. She quickly said they attended a Catholic Church. I then followed up with the question, "does that proved strength for you"? Her response was interesting. She told me that she and her husband kind of do their own thing. In other words I heard from her that her faith is not really a part of her life nor does it give her a lot of support. It was funny when I first met them before I even knew them I sensed that they were very lonely in their challenges. Without God's love, presence, and joy we are truly alone. I said a prayer for them tonight and for Addison. i hope to see them again on Thurs. when we return to the pool. In the mean time I will be reminded of how blessed we are with Isabel, how blessed we are in the fact that we have God in our life leading us and wanting in on everything in our life, especially the challenges. Thank you God for your joy!
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Bewareof agreements!

Looking forward to hearing jimmy's sermon on this topic. It is so cool that all the way down here in Gatlinburg, TN I will be able to download the sermon off of our website at oldfortchurch.com. Agreements according to john E. are these subtle decisions that we allow our hearts to make that actually block our ability to hear from God. They are biases, personal thoughts, and usually powerless thinking that circumvent the real faithful work God wants to do in us. What agreements have you made in your heart?

One agreement that I struggle with at times is that tomorrow is going to be better than today. In other words I find myself not living in the moment but looking ahead to "better" days. Even while on vacation i find myself having trouble enjoying the moment and wishing for something in the future to be here. part of my agreement I sense is to be able to find satisfaction and joy in the moment. This vacation has helped me to become aware of some of the work God still wants to do in my heart. Today we drove up into the Smokey Mountain national fores on a scenic loop that you drive in your car. This look is in the middle of nowhere and there are no business or anything like that. Just a one way narrow road that twists and turns through the mountains. It is beautiful and one of my favorite spots in the Smokey's. Well today as we entered this trail I discovered that I only had a qr. tank of gas left. Not the best of situations. In the middle of nowhere...no chance to get gas...and I am running low. I was starting to let the worry bother my experience and our families experience. I started to worry and hope this moment away to the time I was in front of a gas pump with a full tank. I was missing the beauty of the moment.

At one point we pulled over near a waterfall where the kids were going to play in the water for awhile. I was still worrying about the gas when the kids spotted a swarm of butterflies on the ground in front of us. For the next few minuted the kids interacted with them and were able to touch them and hold them. Erin got pictures of this...it was simple amazing! God provided and suddenly I found myself realizing how foolish I was to wish this stuff away. moments later all the kids and my folks were wading through the mountain stream and just having a blast. the babies loved it and i started jumping from boulder to boulder trying to cross the stream. I felt like a kid myself. I had all but forgotten about my worries and God reminded me that the moment was what he created for us. I experienced another valuable lesson today and in the process was filled with another joyful moment. God's joy for my life is my goal this week and I am feeling a new source of strength in this. After all scripture tells us that the joy of the Lord is my strength. What a joyful day! thanks God. How about you? What great moments are you wishing away and not even realizing what beautiful things god is giving you. Don't buy into the agreements, don't live in the assumptions of your heart but live in to the guarantee of god's love and joy.
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Do you find it hard to be loved?

It is so tough being in need, being in a place where we cannot take care of everything in our life on our own. That means we have some kind of dependence on someone or something else. John E. shares his story of being laid up in a hospital and how hard that was. He relates it to his relationship with God and how Dependant he is on Him. I remember being in the hospital a few months ago with kidney stones and how utterly helpless I felt. I couldn't figure out what God was doing in my life. I wanted understanding. However, I new very quickly that it wasn't for me to figure out why but to figure out for what purpose.

John E. makes a good point in his book when he says, "you can either have understanding or you can have god but you usually can't have both." There is so much that happens in our life that only God will fully know why. In fact if we have God in our life we don't always need to know why. My kids remind me of this. I tell them to go to bed and their first question is, why. I ask them to clean there room and the first question is, why. I ask them to clean up and come inside and they ask...you guessed it, why. I always respond in the same way, "because I said so." Not all of life is meant to be understood but all of our life we are to follow God's lead not matter how confusing and painful it might be. Having a life of joy means to choose how we are going to act in any given situation. We get to choose our mood. Joy comes when we lean into God and trust Him. When we doe this joy is almost always the outcome.

Today was a rich day. We started with worship at First UMC in Pigeon Forge, TN. It was a traditional service which wouldn't always be my first choice. However God met me there and I worship Him with great joy. It reminds me that worship is up to us, not the pastor, musicians, music. It doesn't matter the style or how good someone is. It is up to our hearts being open for God to work. I was open for anything this morning and God blessed me. It was so good just to go to worship on a Sunday without having to prepare for or do anything at all. Letting someone else preach was awesome. I was soaking up every word I was given and praised God. I challenge each of you to worship every Sunday this summer no matter where you go. Find a house of worship and watch God bless you with his joy.

It rained today...normally this would have bummed me out. However this is not a normal week for me. This is my project of joy. So I chose to roll with it and see what God would do. It was a great and relaxing day at the chalet. I watched a little Cubs game, played some pool, soaked in the hot tub with the kids and my dad, grilled out on the deck (it is covered) and just generally had a great day. God's joy was present in my heart even though it was gloomy outside.
Don't get me wrong it wasn't a perfect day. I blew up at the kids a couple of times and got frustrated here and there, but I do sense God doing a new thing in me. Whenever we have been doing something for a long time it takes awhile to break those habits or to start new ones. I feel everyday I am taking baby steps towards greater joy. I has been great! Have a great day of joy in the name of Jesus!
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

It's not about what God isn't giving us!

Man how many times have I been guilty of what John E. talks about today. Those moments where I am really asking God hard for something or for coming through in a big way only to not have that prayer answered. I sure get disappointed in those moments and wonder if God really does still speak. I wonder however, how many times in these moments that God is actually giving us something else that is beautiful only we can't see it because we are so locked into what we don't have. Man John E. hit me right between the eyes. It's not about what I want or what I think will be best for my desires but it is about what God is actually doing in me and around me. There lies the rel treats of life. The beautiful moments He is creating just for me. John E. shares a story where he is hoping for an Antler shed from an Elk on one of his hikes. He becomes disappointed when he doesn't find one. He thought for sure god was going to answer this prayer. However, in the middle of these frustrating feelings god gives him a hawk. A beautiful display of majestic flight right before his eyes. What a gift! Now how many of us would have missed that if we were in his shoes...would have kept sulking while god is doing something else amazing right in front of us...and missed the hawk?

As you may know I am on day 2 of my project of joy. What a great day it was. I had plans set forth in my heart that didn't come out exactly as I was hoping for or praying for. However, God came through in a bigger way than I could have ever dreamed. It was something as simple this morning as trying to decide whether to go to the grocery before the Craft Circle or after. As we were approaching the store Erin suggested that we go first and get it over with. I wanted to go on to the Craft Circle and start our adventure and stop to get groceries later. However as we got closer I heard "go to the store". So we went to the grocery and started out a little later than I had planned.

Now in the craft circle is a soda fountain we try to hit whenever we come to Gatlinburg. Long story short we wound up making it to Glades Soda Fountain just as it opened. Had we not gone to the grocery store first we would have gotten to the soda shop well before it opened and would have missed it. The entire family order an assortment of ice cream floats while he actually mixed up the soda in front of us. It's one of those old fashion soda fountain deals. He actually made my Cherry vanilla Coke before he added the vanilla ice cream. WOW what a treat! The family had a blast. the kids all order Black Cows. (Chocolate ice cream with home made Root beer poured over it). At the end our entire family including my mom and dad gathered inside the shop on the bar stools and the man working there took our picture. I was a moment I will not forget. A memory I will always take with me. A great family moment and oh yeah...awesome ice cream floats. God provided a great moment of joy there! If we had followed my plan we would have missed this. But God had something more beautiful for us.

The second moment of unmistakable joy was later this evening when Erin and I got to go out without the kids. That's automatic joy right there, a break. Basically we held off on dinner until later and went shopping first. It started to get late so we went and got some good barbecue. Now that was joyful also but not the moment I am referring to. It happened on our way back tot he Chalet after our meal. We drove by Krispy Kreme donuts. Now if you have ever bee to one of these places you what it means when they have there neon red sing on that says, NOW BAKING. It means when you order your donuts they come right out of the oven. I have never ever made it to one of these when the light was on. Now was our chance. Erin and I went in we got our donuts and left. In the car we dove in and had the most mouthwatering experience of our lives. Pure joy! Thanks Lord. What makes this amazing is when we passed Krispy Kreme the first time the light was not on. By going to the outlet mall first and eating on the way home which seemed to be God's idea and not mine he gave us something unexpected and beautiful, warm Krispy Kreme donuts. Thanks Lord. It has been a wonderful beautiful joyful day. God you are so good in so many simple ways.

I pray that you move beyond the disappointments of life and see and experience the simple and beautiful things God has waiting for you. I pray you have your soda fountain moment. I pray you have your Krispy Kreme moment. May God richly bless you.
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Project of Joy day 1

Earlier I shared with you something that God had placed on my heart through my reading of John E.'s book "Walking with God." I have been convicted that I have spent too much time in my life just trying to get by, or just trying to go go go all the time. I have asked myself to I really enjoy all of my life? Do I really love the life God has given me and do i discover joy in it every dingle day. Sadly enough I have had to answer no to this. Too often I get short with my kids or Erin. I am grumpy or irritable. there are times where I just want to get through the moment and on to something that I am looking forward to while forsaking the moment that God has given me. All of these things Satan has used to rob the one thing that my life has been designed for. The joy of the Lord!!! I want the joy of the Lord to fill my life in all of its fullness. I want it as the Bible tells us to become complete in me. I am realizing that joy in my life isn't dependent on others, my circumstances, everything going well. Joy is up to me. Joy is a choice, (one I want to choose more often) a decision. If happiness and joy aren't a part of your life you only have one place to look...the mirror. I am the only one making myself miserable in my tough times. Satan finds a weak spot...a crack in my wall and in the path of least resistant he does his best imitation of my attitude and then penetrates my heart.

So today I have begun my project of joy as I continue to learn to hear God's voice in my life. During my entire vacation which started today I am going to focus on joy in my life no matter my circumstance. I am going to learn to respond to everything by resting in and basking in the joy of the Lord. Today it has gone surprisingly well. It hasn't been perfect, i have had my moments with my kids. But there has been a certain peace that has filled my heart. I have found myself content in certain moments that before would have messed with me. I have accepted struggle and not got all bent out of shape. i have put others before myself and it all has been kind of refreshing. I has chosen happiness and joy over frustration, anger, and annoyance. Life has been much more pleasant as i have been to those around me and i find myself happier. Now don't get me wrong this is not some self help gimmick. This is not some inner strength where I am relying on myself. The big change is that i am camping on one single statement. The Joy of the Lord is my strength! When I feel Satan trying to rob me of my life and take me down a path i don't like going I simply claim God's joy by saying that statement over and over in my heart and mind...even out loud if i have to.

At one point I was in the car driving and got cut off in traffic. Normally that would have been a small step toward ruining my mood for about 30 miles. However with my dad sitting next to me reminding me to not get bent out of shape I found myself reciting that scripture out loud. The joy of the Lord is My Strength! My dad and i just chuckled. maybe because it was humorous. Or maybe because it actually worked. God settled my heart and made the moment just that. I moment, not a mood. Thank you Lord fro a great day and a great start to project of Joy. How about you. Where could you use a little bit more joy. Where have you been blaming others for your lack of it? When have you looked at your circumstance and justified your rotten mood. Joy is a choice. Make it your choice. Seek God's word and His council for help and remember that the source of strength for your life is His Joy. Don't ever believe anything different. I am sure there are trials headed my way. But I am already a little stronger because of the work god has done today. God thank you for today. It has been a great joy!
Walking with you,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Just having a bad day or is there something more...

I can really connect with John E.'s writting today on Spiritual Warfare. He makes the claim that most of us don't really recognize the "oppressive stuff" that we are living under daily. We just chalk it up to being in a bad mood, having an off morning, some kind of distraction. In other words we can make an agreemtn to the crud that is going on in our life. We can agree in our hearts that it is noting more than indigestion and a headache... or we can ask Jesus if there is anything else at work here. We already established yesterday that there are other forces in this world at work in our life and they want nohting other than to rob our joy and steal our days. That power is Satan.

So here is the question. How often do we honeslty ask Jesus "where is this CRUD I am expriencing in my life coming from?" Do we honestly choose to seek God to point a finger to what is going on or are we too bussy to do so, or we think He doesn't have the time for this, or maybe we don't really want to hear the answer to this? I have to tell you when I am having a bad day, morning, evening or all fo the above I very seldom go to God with it. I usually blaim it on some external circumstance, someone else, or something else. At times I will blaim it on some stupid choice or decision I made and now I am paying for it. However it could just be that Satan has found a foothold in my life and he is making some headway. Scary to think about, but is altogether a reality!!! It does happen, and if we try to wage war against him on our own then he has won, becuase we don't have the power to do it. I am really open this morning to seeking god's counsel in the crumby days. Maybe for one reason and one reason alone. A selfish reason...I want more JOY in my life. I don't want to be cranky irritable, and hard to life with. My family can attest to this fact. I want the fullness of God's joy in my life. I don't want to be ruled by the devils footholds in my life. He will do anything in his power to rob joy from me and lately he has been winning all to often. Today I take a new stand.

In our Bible study group last night at MY Place I told the group of a project I am undertaking for the 9 days we will be on vacation. It is called my project of Joy. For 9 days I am going to choose God's joy to be my strength. I am going to choose to respond to my children and family with joy. I am going to seek joy in all circumstances in my life no matter what comes. Though I confess that I am a little concened about this project. I know that in order for God to teach me joy He is going to give me circumstances that I am going to have to choose His joy and that gives me a little fear of what might be coming. On the other hand I have a peace because whatever does come my way I beleive I will be stronger to deal with it. Because the joy of the Lord is my strength.

I really believe God is going to do a new work in me on vacation. Not the typical experience that I go away have fun get rest and say hello to God when I get back. I beleive there is a new connection waiting for me in the mountains of Gatlinburg. A connection that I have been needing for sometime. It is time for Joy to reign in my life. Please be praying for me as I am believing God for this new work in me. I pray that God helps you see the enemy for who he really is. A liar, a cheat, and someone who hates your guts!!! No worry's though...if we go to God for His council He will free us from this oppression and replace it with his joy. Time for the project to begin, God...help me, A-men.
Walking Together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

What if I can't hear God?

I think we have all been here before. We pray to God, open our heart to Him, attentively listen for the answer and then we hear...nothing! We start to question and wonder if God is really there. We start asking does He still speak or what have I done to not hear Him today. Maybe I have fallen from His grace and am not going to be able to hear Him anymore. John E. in his book WWG reminds us that our position in Christ is not a result of being able to hear God speak on any given day. We are secure in Christ because of His grace and nothing else. Our ability to hear God speak then becomes a natural outflow of our relationship with Him. Any relationship will take time. It takes time to grow into this with God and it takes time to learn and be familiar with his voice. Think about it...if we haven't been investing in our relationship with God regularly how could we expect the hear from Him regularly. The two go hand in hand. Today our challenge is to ask ourselves honestly, how much have we invested in spending time with God. How close have we walked with him through our days in all the "in between" stuff the simple things. As we answer this we will have answer to how we can hear God more.

We are also reminded that there is something else out there that would desire to keep us from hearing God's voice. He is as real as God. There are three important revelations to life. the first one is that God exists and in real. The second is that we have to deal with His existence in a personal way. The third is a little less popular with folk...Satan is real and is powerful. Satan does try to work in our life. He tries blocking our connection to God. Quietly and cunningly sneaking his way into our hearts. He works overtime to steal our joy and to rob us of our connection to God. We have to be aware that in times we can't her God's voice maybe it is because Satan has worked His way into our life somehow. I liken him to running water. Water has this incredible ability to work its way through the path of least resistance. There can be a solid concrete barrier but if there is even a hint of a crack anywhere the water will eventually find it and seep in. Satan is similar He will work and work and find the path of least resistance in us. he will look for the crack in our fortress or the chink in our armor and come in.

John E. reminds us to keep watch for His activity and to bring Christ's power against when we feel week. Some of us are not comfortable talking about Satan but the truth is whether we acknowledge him or not He is real and working in this world. And he hopes to be working in us. I pray today that we all take stock of our life, our current posture and look for places where Satan might want to creep in. Open you eyes and your heart to God this day and realize that He is yours and you are His and that nothing can separate His love for you.
Walking together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

What should I read today?

I think for most of us we want to read the Bible more and we have good intentions of picking it up and looking in to some of it. But when it really comes down to actually doing it we get lost or discouraged or don't even know where to start or what to read. I love days reading from John Eldridge's book "Walking with God".when he suggests asking God what we should read. Again something simple that we may never have taken the time to do. We just have in the past picked it up without even thinking or turning it over to God and just stated reading. What if we invited God into our Bible reading by seeking his direction?

Here's the funny thing about scripture that I have discovered over the years. You can read it have no Spiritual experience whatsoever. If you wanted you could read through it like any other "good" book and look at it simply from an intellectual perspective. Truthfully many people have done this. Bible does nothing for them even though they have read it from cover to cover. Then there are those like myself that when we read it, the pages become this life transforming experience where God's presence is felt and know. If I was really honest with you I have lived in and experienced both while reading scripture. The times when it has done nothing for me however are the times I have not invited God into the reading. There is something about God's Word that actually requires His spiritual presence in order to have our lives impacted. Makes a lot of sense doesn't it?

The next time you pick up the Bible invited God into it. Ask Jesus what you should read and while reading it invite God into the moment with simple questions like...God what are you trying to say to me in this passage? God what would you have me do as a result of what I am reading? God what change, or what do I need to do differently based on what I am reading? You will find that the more you engage God while in His word the more rich and life transformational the experience will be.

In this chapter John also reminds us that we are to not just be believers of Christ but to be followers of Him. That Jesus goes out ahead of us and actually blazes a trail for our day that we can choose to follow or not. Are we following Jesus daily or are we off doing our own thing? Are we following in the in between times, the simple small tasks and things? Or are we just engaging God when there is a huge issue that we need help with. John reminds us that someone who believes is God and has invited Christ into their heart but doesn't really follow Him through all the day to day stuff is bordering on Deism. YIKES, that is scary! That means we think there is a God up there in heaven but really have no interest in letting Him lead us. Sadly however that is where many of us are. What does that say about what we really believe? What does that say about where our life is really going? Something to ponder throughout today. May God richly bless you today and all this week as you open up His Word and dive right into His presence. May he change your life as you read and interact with Him. And may you learn how to follow Him a little bit more today. These are my prayers for us this day.
Walking together,
Your Dreaming Pastor

Well here goes on Whole, Holiness, and Joy

Some of you may not know this but our church for the month of July is going through the book by John Eldridge called, "Walking with God". There is a reading calendar set up so that one can read the entire book in the month of July with readings for everyday of the month. It is my goal to offer some reflection and life challenging questions everyday based upon the particular reading for the day.

I began this quest in order to enrich the lives of those in our congregation to help them unpack what they are reading daily and I believe that it will for those who choose to throw themselves at this study and my blog. However, I find myself doing this project for an entirely unexpected benefit...my own! I am sensing I need to do this for me. God wants me to not only be faithfully in His Word everyday, reading this book everyday, but he wants me to journal and reflect on it everyday. Since I am preaching on prayer and follow Christ's lead when we hear His voice I better do the same. Then I thought, what better place do do this than in my blog where everyone can share in on the stuff God is doing in me through this book and my quiet times.

I know I have missed the first week but I am going to pick with with July 7th's reading which is today and from this point forward commit to blogging everyday. I believe God is going to do something new in my life as a result of this commitment. I pray that He does something similar in you as you interact with these thoughts from a sinner saved by God's grace. Enjoy

Today John E. reminded all of us about the drive in our life. The constant doing striving and going everyday the same thing. Then he popped this question for me. What part of my life haven't I given to Jesus? Is there a part of me that just keeps going w/out any involvement from God. God strives to give us wholeness. In other words to completely fill our entire life. However, he can only do that if I have given Him everything. What is it in you that you are holding back? This is significant because God wants us to share in His Holiness. WOW imagine that...how awesome that God wants to share that with us. He DOES! Now the only way to grow in God's Holiness is to have Wholeness of our life in God. Meditate on that this day.

Because, when we work towards wholeness and live more fully in God's Holiness then comes joy. I loved John E.'s question about joy. Do you really experience joy? Can you honestly claim that your life is filled with joy? What do yo think you need to have more joy? The truth is only a whole relationship with God in His Holiness will lead to lasting joy in our life. Thus our quest for the month of July...to become more whole in Christ, to share more fully in His Holiness, and to experience the abundant joy he has set forth for us. Walking with you, Your Dreaming Pastor

How's the walking with God thing?

Hey gang I wanted to check in with you and see how your reading is going with "Walking with God". This book has been a rich experience for me and I pray it has been for you already. For those of you who haven't purchased it you can get it at the church info table for $15. For those of you who have I encourage yo to get started on the reading schedule that was included with the book.

By now some of you have discovered that yes God in fact does still speak to us. And why wouldn't he. The Bible is filled with examples of God talking to his people and you are one of those people. Why else would he have given us His Word and not have that be a part of our life as well. I like the verse in James that says "The prayers of a righteous person are powerful and affective" or something like that. Do you honestly believe in your heart that you CAN hear from God? Believe it and practice it! This month of July is going to be a new experience for many of us. I have found Eldridge's book to be extremely challenging and at times uncomfortable. But it does have promise to lift us out of our comfort zones and our paralyzed prayer lives. I am already sensing He is working in some of your hearts and challenging you to live powerful lives in God and not wimpy weak lives. We have the power of prayer and I pray that we all grow in it.

Don't get discouraged. Hearing from God doesn't just happen overnight. It happens and comes to us out of a relationship. the more we work at our relationship and the more familiar we are with the person in the relationship the better able we are to hear their voice. If you are having trouble discerning god's voice or feeling like your prayers are not effective than this is the book for you. Open your hearts to what God wants to do. Invest yourself in this study and the sermons in July and watch what God can do. Blessings, Your Dreaming Pastor