Torn between two loves...

I have two major loves in my life right now. One is my devotion to my family and the other is my commitment to the local church that I serve. One of the greatest struggles in my life is how to handle situations when those two things collide. There are often times where my family is going in one direction with a commitment or activity and my responsibilities at the church are going in another direction. For instance last summer we had this awesome sermon series called "Facing the Giants". Well the Friday night that we had movie night my son Austin was playing in his first tournament game with his baseball team. I was the assistant coach. I missed that game and probably will always regret it. But what should a person do. I know for a fact that if I missed our movie night here at OFC and gone to the game I would have regretted missing that event as well. I always heard it described by other pastors like this..."when I'm at home I feel like I should be at church and when I am at church I feel like I should be at home." I can certainly relate to that. Life is filled with choices and commitments. How do we decide in these tough circumstances. I always try to put myself in my kids shoes in these cases. When I was a child at least one of my parents made it to every one of my basketball games, awards ceremonies, concerts, or banquets. In fact through my basketball career I never once remember my parents not being there even at some of our far away road games. When I think of that it brings me back to today and my commitment to my kids and my family. How can I make sure I create those memories for them?

Like for instance my dilemma with my daughter Tawna and her Baton/twirling team. Their major competition for the year just happens to be the same morning of one of our biggest events of the year at OFC, our Easter outreach to the community. My entire family will be going to see Tawna's performance, even my folks are coming up from Dayton to go see her. This is one of the only competitions she will participate in all year. How could I miss that? Tawna will remember that day for the rest of her life and I won't be there.

But then again we are putting on a major ministry outreach here at the church. I will be asking and recruiting people to come and to serve. I will be expecting our leaders to show up and do a great job as they put on an excellent party for the community. How could I miss that? People will want to know, well where is the pastor? How could he miss such an important event? These moments for me are some of the most difficult times when it comes to being a parent and a pastor. I can handle the crisis, the back biting, people's frustration, the ugly parts of being in the ministry. But when it comes to things like this I feel lost and lonely. You might think that it isn't that big of a deal but for me I just get torn. I show up to one place while my heart is somewhere else. I am sure all of you can relate to these circumstances.

It's kind of funny... I'm the one always throwing advice out to you guys. Now I need a little encouragement from you. How do you handle and deal with these kinds of circumstances? I would love to hear any of your feedback on this one. I know you can't decide for me and I don't expect you to. Just looking for any insights you might have or what you might do. Look forward to your comments. Blessings, Your Dreaming & Torn Pastor